Thursday, August 18, 2005

Jessica Simpson takes over the world

WWD reports that Jessica Simpson has inked a $15 million fashion and accessories deal to expand the Jessica Simpson empire. Not too shabby, Jess! But lest we forget, may I remind you that two short years ago, Jessica Simpson was a B-list celebrity at best, viewed as a third-rate Christina Aguilera and probably best known for being a preacher's daughter and having massive boobs (well, okay, she's still known for that, but whatever.) My, how our girl has grown! Congrats, Jess! (Sincerely.) Now if only you could smother those pesky divorce rumors...

I will repeat it over and over until I am blue in the face—Joe Simpson is a genius.

8 Comments:

Blogger nita said...

Joe Simpson is lucky. Saw the reality tv wave coming and threw his daughter into the drink.

I watched about 17 seconds of one Newlywed and that was all I could take. Honestly, if you're that stupid, don't talk. If you're faking something, why fake being so stupid you shouldn't talk?!

8/18/2005 2:49 PM  
Blogger Avery said...

Love your blog! I'm adding you to my link list. Your observations are hilarious!

8/18/2005 3:09 PM  
Blogger cutiepiebunny said...

Here is a thought...Jessica Simpson sat out on the B-list for years, then when Britney Spears is over it and Christina Aguliera is too deep to play the game...Jesscia comes to the forefront...hmmm...is Joe Simpson really a that smart that his daughter got work when everyone was over it and someone has to be out there????

8/18/2005 7:20 PM  
Blogger Sweetiepie47 said...

If by genius you mean pimping your daughter out to the entertainment industry, then yes he's a genius.

Here is my theory of Jessica's climb to the top:

1. Jessica displays talent as a kid.
2. Daddy tries to get her on Mickey mouse club...no go.
3. Daddy tries to get her to sing gospel. No go...due to boobs.
4. Daddy gets idea to sell her as a pop tart that way the boobs can work.
5. Jess meets Nick and they fall in love.
6. Daddy sees Nick as a)possible replacement for him and b)possible roadblock to fortune and fame.
7. Daddy gets Jess to break up with Nick saying she is concentrating on her career.
8. Daddy realizes he can make more money with Nick in the picture, so he convinces them to get back together, get married on tv, then broadcast their marriage.
9. Daddy then uses daughter's new fame to endorse, endorse, endorse.
10. Marriage starts to suffer due to Daddy's incestuous interest in his daughter.
11. Daddy keeps pushing and pushing as Jess grows into a megastar leaving husband Nick in the dust.

Her father has not done a thing for her, other than use her and sell her. I truly believe that she and Nick belong together, but they need to leave the country and her family and have a lives of their own.

8/18/2005 8:23 PM  
Blogger Jenny V said...

I just have to throw one in here for my girl Jess! You girls are brutal (lol)! Is she a ditz? Of course, but give the girl a break! She was destined to be famous and with the help of her Papa has indeed succeeded. When she signed on for Newlyweds, she nor her Dad had any idea the show would sky rocket her career like it has. They knew it would be successful, but I really don't believe Joe had any intention of "pimping" his daughter. But like she has said in some interviews, she's loving it! And why shouldn't she? Wouldn't you?

Jolie - Keep the Nick & Jess posts comin - I love them!

8/19/2005 10:13 AM  
Blogger Brooks said...

He may be a genius, but as a dad with a daughter, that guy creeps me out.
Brooks Blog

8/19/2005 11:14 PM  
Blogger Jolie said...

I agree, Brooks—he's mega-creepy. It should be interesting to see how their relationship plays out over the coming years; I wonder if Jessica will continue to appreciate his help or will start resenting his influence.

8/20/2005 5:39 PM  
Blogger bubbles said...

And I'm still shocked to find out that she's (going to) play(ing) Daisy Duke in the new Dukes movie. Ugggggh.

That movie, imho, was a HUGE mistake in the first place so yours truly will refuse to go to the theatre and see it. I'd much rather spend €60 on the first season DVD, mille grazie.

Abyssinia

8/21/2005 4:20 PM  

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