Thursday, July 07, 2005

The Katie-Bot Speaks

The new W features a totally awkward article with Katie Holmes that includes such deep and meaningful soundbites as: "I've found the man of my dreams," "He's the most incredible man," "I've never met anybody like Tom," "He's the man of my dreams," and "He's my man! He's my man!" Katie gets so riled up that she mistakes herself for a cheerleader, doing splits on the floor and jumping up on down on her chair. (Enough with the chair jumping, you psychos. How many innocent pieces of furniture have to be trampled for you to "prove" that you really, really love each other?) Tom doesn't make an appearance—thank God—but still manages to make it all about him by sending Katie a diamond necklace from Cartier during the interview. Diamonds, household-name status and however many freaking millions she's getting paid for all of this: Katie Holmes is the smartest woman on the face of the planet. (Hey, she gets to hone her acting skills, too!)
Holmes, Sweet Holmes (


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